I am going to start an art journal again and was going through some of my previous notebooks and pads. I came across these two pen/ink/watercolors in an old book that were done between 12-15 years ago. They aren't masterpieces by any means but it brought something to life. For years, and now I'm talking back to high school, I used a rapidograph pen/black ink and watercolors. It was my medium of choice. I wish I had all those I did back then but alas I only have these that were done much later. Anyway, it really tugged at my "art strings" to want to revisit this medium again.
I have no idea where the first one came from in terms of what I had drawn, perhaps I was dreaming of my own courtyard. The second one I do remember. A good friend who lived in Mpls. at the time would tell me in phone conversations about her then just turned teen daughter and her daughters friends. They'd congregate in their backyard (which was expansive) and each girl had her own story....one had actually been raped in a park at a young age. It was very sad indeed. My friend would talk to this girl and all the girls really about real life, real issues like body image, trust, etc. She was good that way and the girls appreciated her candor and her understanding and the ability to listen to them. So after one such phone conversation I drew that picture with the image of the woman in the background as my friend trying to protect all of them. It's called "The Girls in Her Backyard". Her daughter is in her 20's now and I think I am going to send my friend a copy of that drawing.
And then I came upon my senior yearbook.
I asked myself the question......where did that girl go?
This was written inside the back cover from one of my favorite people/teachers............I know you'll be shocked when I tell you he taught ART!
This was from another very favorite person/teacher and was written inside the front cover. He taught sociology. He was very progressive and adored by many - we even called him by his first name.
If you can't read his writing he wrote:
"Lisa, you are a liver and a dooer......keep living and doing, your zest for life has kept me going many days that were very hard......Live your dreams."
After reading what they wrote, seeing my senior photo and finding those drawings I didn't sit and wax nostalgic. Oh no, that's not what this is about. This is about a realization that I AM that girl still, oh I may have more chins and bigger thighs and have to wear bifocals now BUT INSIDE that girl is me and I am her. I lost sight of that for a while.....a long while.
The difference now is that I have had more experience than that girl in the photo. I've seen more, done more, lived more than that time frozen in a yearbook.
BUT I still listen to Joni Mitchell, I am still an artist, I still write stories, I still act silly occasionally, I still love making people laugh, I still dream of that cottage by the ocean, and so on......
I AM that girl. SHE is ME.
We're just older now.
and we're hopefully wiser
and we're going to falter now and then.
But at the end of the day.........we DO have that zest for life, it just got clouded for a while.
This was a really cathartic exploration.
No more writing on this blog about woe is me or whining or any of that.......we're all human and we all have days or weeks like that but we are the only ones responsible to fix it, change it, alter it.
For me the concentration for 2009 is going to be ZEST!
NO not the zest from citrus peels or the name of a soap product.....
Zest by definition is also:
noun: invigorating or keen excitement or enjoyment; vigorous and enthusiastic enjoyment
You know, my Mom, until almost the bitter end, had an incredible ZEST for life - it's a good word and it's an even better way to be!
There are many bloggers who have chosen a word for setting the intention for the New Year...words like courage, balance, conscious, release, hope, connection and so on. ALL fantastic.
I finally found MINE
and it feels rather good.....
say it with me.......
Z E S T!!!
woohoo!!!
Love,
Lisa
XOXO
If you read this entire post, I know mine have been rather lenghty lately, I want to say a hearty THANK YOU for sticking with me!!
I have no idea where the first one came from in terms of what I had drawn, perhaps I was dreaming of my own courtyard. The second one I do remember. A good friend who lived in Mpls. at the time would tell me in phone conversations about her then just turned teen daughter and her daughters friends. They'd congregate in their backyard (which was expansive) and each girl had her own story....one had actually been raped in a park at a young age. It was very sad indeed. My friend would talk to this girl and all the girls really about real life, real issues like body image, trust, etc. She was good that way and the girls appreciated her candor and her understanding and the ability to listen to them. So after one such phone conversation I drew that picture with the image of the woman in the background as my friend trying to protect all of them. It's called "The Girls in Her Backyard". Her daughter is in her 20's now and I think I am going to send my friend a copy of that drawing.
And then I came upon my senior yearbook.
I asked myself the question......where did that girl go?
This was written inside the back cover from one of my favorite people/teachers............I know you'll be shocked when I tell you he taught ART!
This was from another very favorite person/teacher and was written inside the front cover. He taught sociology. He was very progressive and adored by many - we even called him by his first name.
If you can't read his writing he wrote:
"Lisa, you are a liver and a dooer......keep living and doing, your zest for life has kept me going many days that were very hard......Live your dreams."
After reading what they wrote, seeing my senior photo and finding those drawings I didn't sit and wax nostalgic. Oh no, that's not what this is about. This is about a realization that I AM that girl still, oh I may have more chins and bigger thighs and have to wear bifocals now BUT INSIDE that girl is me and I am her. I lost sight of that for a while.....a long while.
The difference now is that I have had more experience than that girl in the photo. I've seen more, done more, lived more than that time frozen in a yearbook.
BUT I still listen to Joni Mitchell, I am still an artist, I still write stories, I still act silly occasionally, I still love making people laugh, I still dream of that cottage by the ocean, and so on......
I AM that girl. SHE is ME.
We're just older now.
and we're hopefully wiser
and we're going to falter now and then.
But at the end of the day.........we DO have that zest for life, it just got clouded for a while.
This was a really cathartic exploration.
No more writing on this blog about woe is me or whining or any of that.......we're all human and we all have days or weeks like that but we are the only ones responsible to fix it, change it, alter it.
For me the concentration for 2009 is going to be ZEST!
NO not the zest from citrus peels or the name of a soap product.....
Zest by definition is also:
noun: invigorating or keen excitement or enjoyment; vigorous and enthusiastic enjoyment
You know, my Mom, until almost the bitter end, had an incredible ZEST for life - it's a good word and it's an even better way to be!
There are many bloggers who have chosen a word for setting the intention for the New Year...words like courage, balance, conscious, release, hope, connection and so on. ALL fantastic.
I finally found MINE
and it feels rather good.....
say it with me.......
Z E S T!!!
woohoo!!!
Love,
Lisa
XOXO
If you read this entire post, I know mine have been rather lenghty lately, I want to say a hearty THANK YOU for sticking with me!!
