For months my days were clouded dark.....Barely any moments with blue sky peeking through
Then the time came to go away for the weekend of the 15th and as we got closer to our destination I knew things had to lighten up (Or rather I hoped they would)
When we pulled in their driveway that night the clouds began to part even further exposing the long awaited blue sky moment I hoped for
and the sun came shining through in my heart and my whole being
Within a couple of hours there was more blue sky and WAY less clouds - in fact they were just a wisp of nothing - lifting my concern.
By the end of the weekend the shift was completely and totally evident
....and the shift remains. And the reason I am still talking about it is because I am still baffled by it all. That I could go from all that dark sky that has been over me for so long to now standing amongst the blue sky moments in true awe. How does that happen? I am still scratching my head over all this.......oh believe me I LOVE it.......but it still baffles me. I wasn't lying when I talked about depression a few posts back....it's been real. So THAT is why I keep marveling about all this because this is real too. AND NO I am not manic depressive....NO I don't have mood shifts.........NO this is not some weird high where I will crash and burn. I had a profound SHIFT and therefore it has made me more conscious to stay more in the moment.....stay more present and be grateful for the dos and not stress as much over the don'ts. Grateful for the haves and not stress as much about the have nots. For sure as I learn and evolve with this there will be moments where I start to think in the negative - get down.... BUT I am retraining myself to turn my gaze back to the blue sky and then if those clouds appear I just look for interesting images in them, I look for the open spots. I should have learned this a long time ago, maybe I am just more open to it now. I just don't know.
This may all sound like a bunch of mumbo jumbo to some.......and a bit repetative to boot....but for me it is how I roll. I write it out.....I let others see what is in my mind sometimes.
And on a different note.......we have begun another DIY home project. The bathroom, our old 1949 bathroom with the icky pink tile and the icky floor. We cannot afford to gut and remodel so we are having the tile, tub and bathroom sink resurfaced all in a white (at a mere fraction to replace it all)....fresh and new....that begins tomorrow. YIKES! From there we begin the rest....I will have before, during and after photos to share at some point. This has been needed for YEARS but we kept holding out for a possible total remodel....we are smacking ourselves in the head we didn't do a "makeover" a long time ago.
I hope you are all having a great start to your week.........this is the last time (I hope) I talk about all this "cloudy" stuff.
P.S. I talked to L. last night and we have been invited back for a weekend in November!!!! Cooler weather, same great company and they already have fun to-dos planned! We are so excited!
